Writing Sample

W.A.L.T Inform 

Success Criteria 

Done         Need To Work On

• use a range of verbs (evaporate, melt, etc.)

• use a variety of specific vocabulary (matter, solid, liquid, gas)

• add significant detail to describe each part (examples, diagram, giff)

• vary sentence starters

• organise my ideas into at least 5 paragraphs

  Draft

  

                                              
   Published Version 
  
  
  Heat And Temperature
  
  

  Did you know that heat and temperature are not the same thing? Scientifically speaking hot and cold is called thermal energy.

  
  

  The hotter something is the more thermal energy it has and the colder something is the less thermal energy it has. For an example if you go in a hot pool and then go in a cold pool you would feel colder because all the thermal energy in the pool is trying to get to the same temperature.

  
  

  The Reason we call thing hot and cold is because we compare that thermal energy with our own body temperature. 

  
  

  People use thermometers to measure temperature. When you put a thermometer outside the atoms in the mercury start to slow down and drop so the temperature is lower, outside but when you take it inside the thermal energy in the atoms start to get excited and start to move and jump up and down more so the temperature starts to rise. 

  
  

  The hotter something is the more thermal energy it has so it rises and the colder the thermal energy the lower it goes on the thermometer.

  
  
  I think that I did a good job and I would give myslef a 8 out of 10 but maybe next time I could expian about the atoms.
  
  
  Feedback I like how you explained how heat and Temaperture good
  
  
  Feedfoward you could say that was my first draft and now it is my better one to say there is not two stories
  Logan